tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post2298939076454196423..comments2023-12-18T17:32:03.325+00:00Comments on Kindred of the Quiet Way: PuzzleUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-66408005764435026972014-12-18T10:15:47.398+00:002014-12-18T10:15:47.398+00:00I'm so glad you found the post a helpful discu...I'm so glad you found the post a helpful discussion starter! It sounds as though you did some digging deep in your responses. xx<br />Pen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-83390923060571884272014-12-18T09:32:35.438+00:002014-12-18T09:32:35.438+00:00This is an interesting dilema :-) I used this post...This is an interesting dilema :-) I used this post to start off a discussion in my house group this week. Once we talked ourselves into realising our reference point ought to be what God says and not what any social group says we used an on-line bible to look up scriptures where it says "one another". It was very challenging to read what scripture says about how we should treat each other.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-12020890647313553362014-12-15T13:20:46.792+00:002014-12-15T13:20:46.792+00:00Group C! That's a good plan!
Like this poem:
...Group C! That's a good plan!<br /><br />Like this poem:<br /><br />An Autobiography in Five Chapters<br />by Portia Nelson<br /><br />Chapter 1<br />I walk down the street.<br />There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.<br />I fall in. I am lost….I am helpless.<br />It isn’t my fault.<br />It takes forever to find a way out.<br /><br />Chapter 2<br />I walk down the same street.<br />There is a deep hole in the side walk.<br />I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again.<br />I can’t believe I am in the same place.<br />But it isn’t my fault.<br />It still takes a long time to get out.<br /><br />Chapter 3<br />I walk down the same street.<br />There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.<br />I see it is there.<br />I fall in….it’s a habit…but my eyes are open.<br />I know where I am. It is my fault.<br />I get out immediately.<br /><br />Chapter 4<br />I walk down the same street.<br />There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.<br />I walk around it.<br /><br />Chapter 5<br />I walk down a different street.Pen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-45773156395887059372014-12-15T08:12:29.037+00:002014-12-15T08:12:29.037+00:00I would go to group c for a while and see how thin...I would go to group c for a while and see how things went before deciding to return to group a or b. <br />Spending time alone would be useful too. It's like taking a break from TV, when you go back to it, you can't believe the crap you were exposing yourself to. <br />Annenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-3672629258625934392014-12-14T12:32:19.449+00:002014-12-14T12:32:19.449+00:00Thank you.Thank you.Pilgrimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13263860830512792429noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-888235949664165082014-12-13T16:19:07.774+00:002014-12-13T16:19:07.774+00:00Ooh! If *that's* what heaven will be like, I w...Ooh! If *that's* what heaven will be like, I want to be there!<br /><br />I think what you say in your comment is similar to Deborah's comments - a confidence that comes from faith, a habit of honesty and simplicity that makes a person very well-grounded. Beautiful. xxPen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-59133206341004770032014-12-13T11:07:55.187+00:002014-12-13T11:07:55.187+00:00Such an interesting topic Pen. I think that if I w...Such an interesting topic Pen. I think that if I were honest with myself which I really try to be, I'd know deep down if I was an A. Then if I was a B, I might give in to these people for a while, hoping that they might improve, but again, truth, I feel would prevail and I would most likely step away because they would make me feel uncomfortable. So it all comes back to being honest with yourself. I can honestly say that I know my faults. I don't like them and I try to be the best that I can be but I'm not there yet. Didn't Jesus say "You will know the truth and the truth will set you free" That word truth is such and amazing word. You asked "How could you arrive at an accurate evaluation?" I would search out the truth and then even though I might not like what I see in myself, at least I have place to start from. I can then choose to change or just stay were I am. I am smiling as I write this because many years ago I remember my mother used to remind me often that "you are judged by the company you keep." and therein is another truth.<br />Again Pen, lots to ponder in this post. Have a lovely weekend.<br />Blessings Gail.<br />p.s. Aren't we going to have such great discussions when we all get together in heaven. I'll love meeting you and all these lovely people in person. Such a great bunch and so interesting.gailhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11474172270399240621noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-63003239561570073112014-12-13T07:27:23.636+00:002014-12-13T07:27:23.636+00:00But Pilgrim, that *is* exactly the kind of questio...But Pilgrim, that *is* exactly the kind of question I' addressing. Because as well as standing your ground, you also have to maintain awareness that you might be wrong - balance up whether you're under attack from making forces or simply paranoid!! God bless you and your son. Coming from a family where the members are neurologically atypical, I know the territory! xxPen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-6531692543739331122014-12-13T02:40:35.892+00:002014-12-13T02:40:35.892+00:00This seemed academic to me when I first read it. H...This seemed academic to me when I first read it. However, I have a son with soecial needs I have to advocate for in the school system. This has almost always meant standing alone, in meetings of six to ten people who agree on a shared reality before you enter the room, usually underestimating your child's ability. You do have to find a way to evaluate your own behavior, especially at times when you have been ambushed and reacted poorly. Not exactly the question you are addressing, but related.Pilgrimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13263860830512792429noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-88177433467869147862014-12-12T22:08:39.200+00:002014-12-12T22:08:39.200+00:00Ah, yes - good point! xxAh, yes - good point! xxPen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-37961930671345747972014-12-12T14:24:14.365+00:002014-12-12T14:24:14.365+00:00Something to be said, too, for longevity within a ...Something to be said, too, for longevity within a community. The temptation I think is to flit from group to group seeking approval, acceptance, etc. (All legitimate longings/needs.) Relationships take time. We give up too soon. And sometimes, our expectations are SO unrealistic, making our "search" to belong almost impossible.<br /><br />(Thinking out loud here.....and heavily influenced by my personal experiences)Rebeccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08740950362293427086noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-21837657128417621262014-12-11T22:46:47.531+00:002014-12-11T22:46:47.531+00:00Thanks, friends - I'll seek that out, DMW; Lan...Thanks, friends - I'll seek that out, DMW; Lana, yes, that sounds about right.<br /><br />xxxPen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-14762762108669684262014-12-11T21:48:11.751+00:002014-12-11T21:48:11.751+00:00I think if this involved children, whose personali...I think if this involved children, whose personalities are not yet formed, the nasty child might become a nice one if in a nice group. Sadly, the nice one surrounded by nasty ones would probably become nasty. As for adults, if being devious is in one's nature, one would gravitate to that kind of crowd. Nice folk would want to be with other nice folk, and if they weren't, I think gut feelings would tell you these people are not who you want to be friends with. LANAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05946005009680968861noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-22457433107070574842014-12-11T21:47:58.517+00:002014-12-11T21:47:58.517+00:00A book you might find interesting is "Maligna...A book you might find interesting is "Malignant Self Love" written and self-published by Sam Vaknin, available on Amazon, about Narcissistic Personality Disorder written by someone who has the diagnosis.<br />DMWAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-84373104809060606262014-12-11T16:40:13.555+00:002014-12-11T16:40:13.555+00:00Not preachy at all - very inspiring. xxNot preachy at all - very inspiring. xxPen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-51654583465789136122014-12-11T16:37:46.162+00:002014-12-11T16:37:46.162+00:00I know. that brings me back to what I said before ...I know. that brings me back to what I said before though. The only thing that any Christian can do is rely on the Holy Spirit to prompt *us* when our behaviour is unacceptable to God. I think we need to dig in deeper with God and stay close to him regardless of what anyone else might say or think about us. We cannot judge who we are compared to other people...we can only see who we are supposed to be compared with Jesus. the more we are like him the better we will be but that doesn't mean that we will be acceptable to those around us. Jesus wasn't accepted, Jesus made loads of people mad...when he made his whip and turned over the tables in the temple they were not happy with him. Probably thought he was destructive, mental, all sorts of things but he was right before God. <br /><br />Being a disciple of Jesus is a journey, we don't stay as we were when we committed ourselves to follow him and we aren't currently who we will be in the future. God deals with us in different ways and at different times...what we see in someone else as something that needs changing may be not what God is having them work on at the moment. Plus just coz they think they are right now doesn't mean they will think they are right in 6 months time. There are a lot of things I categorically *knew* were right in the past that I know know were not right...but who knows if that'll be the same in the future :-D<br /><br />I'll stick with relying on the Holy Spirit to prompt me and change me into being more like Jesus and just sit back and enjoy the journey. <br /><br />Hope I've explained myself and not sounded too preachy coz I don't mean it to sound that way.<br /> Deborahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17295624431714012643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-30182528077620164532014-12-11T16:23:08.542+00:002014-12-11T16:23:08.542+00:00Thanks, Deb - good counsel. Please note, though, t...Thanks, Deb - good counsel. Please note, though, that the puzzle in the post is not about deciding what other people are, but about evaluating oneself in the face of their strong opinions - when they, like the person concerned, might also be devout Christians and therefore also feel justified in claiming they are right. It cannot be made simple.Pen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-60341524207464330652014-12-11T15:58:20.029+00:002014-12-11T15:58:20.029+00:00I guess that's why, ultimately, we need to wor...I guess that's why, ultimately, we need to work on ourselves and leave other people to God to deal with. Keep ourselves as right with God as we can and as sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit as we can be and recognise that everyone is on a journey and they may not be in the same place that we are.Deborahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17295624431714012643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-24592378279355598692014-12-11T15:52:29.932+00:002014-12-11T15:52:29.932+00:00Buuuut - when you say 'If you are working with...Buuuut - when you say 'If you are working with God to become more like Jesus then you know when you are behaving like an idiot. ' - well, then the problem wouldn't apply to you, would it? Cos you'd just know. But in the interests of full disclosure I must admit I've known some Christians who think they are filled with the Holy Spirit, absolutely right and instruments of His divine Word - but still sound a lot like idiots to me!Pen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-25295384452527631322014-12-11T15:30:10.467+00:002014-12-11T15:30:10.467+00:00Not if you've been in a relationship with Jesu...Not if you've been in a relationship with Jesus for a while and are becoming increasingly sensitive to the Holy Spirit. If you are working with God to become more like Jesus then you know when you are behaving like an idiot. That's what I love about the Holy Spirit...there's no room for excuses coz he shows you what's wrong. It's just up to us whether we act on it.Deborahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17295624431714012643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-35589507253072942572014-12-11T15:24:02.468+00:002014-12-11T15:24:02.468+00:00Although if you were the selfish, scheming, manipu...Although if you were the selfish, scheming, manipulative, aggressive and sinful person, you could get some very dodgy results from that, perhaps?Pen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-77809256640292223552014-12-11T15:17:35.276+00:002014-12-11T15:17:35.276+00:00I'd ask God and trust the Holy Spirit to show ...I'd ask God and trust the Holy Spirit to show me and then act accordingly.Deborahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17295624431714012643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-15790671125526773432014-12-11T12:30:33.899+00:002014-12-11T12:30:33.899+00:00Perhaps in view of the unfolding comment thread, I...Perhaps in view of the unfolding comment thread, I should make it clear that I am not trapped in some sinister sect - though it is true I have some life issues to work through where it's hard to get an objective take on reality. xxPen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-80016150102524762022014-12-11T12:11:09.574+00:002014-12-11T12:11:09.574+00:00Friends, you are wise and thoughtful people, and I...Friends, you are wise and thoughtful people, and I am very proud to know you xxxPen Wilcockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13818227904371811230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55532501364780143.post-47495892456758954102014-12-11T12:00:34.755+00:002014-12-11T12:00:34.755+00:00Pen - I've been thinking about a specific inst...Pen - I've been thinking about a specific instance in my life. Over 20 years ago I joined a small established Christian community helping the homeless for 6 months whilst studying for a diploma in Pastoral Theology at a Christian college unconnected o the community. It's a long story, but whilst at college I felt loved and loveable, interesting and worthwhile. When I came 'home' I felt I was a v odd person. I was accused of having anger issues because I was too polite, I was told by one worker that it was obvious I loved the people we worked with, but by her boss that it was obvious I didn't - I tried to get a community meeting to discuss tensions I felt and was told I was making heavy weather of things and basically to lighten up. Finally, I went to see a counsellor myself, as I wondered if I really did have big psychological problems, and the counsellor, after listening to what I said about the community, told me that it wasn't me that had the anger issues but the community, who were denying them. I also had a good friend who told me I wasn't going mad and that i should leave. Sure enough, soon after I left the community, (as soon as I could) when my diploma course ended, it imploded dramatically. The people who had got on so well together whilst making my life a misery suddenly had major bust ups and at least three (including the priest who refused to hold community meetings because there was nothing to discuss and the nun who said I had anger issues) left v quickly. It was a lesson to me that sometimes communities are just sick and weird things can happen to individuals who walk unwittingly into such and are not part of the dynamics. Straight after that I spent my summer in a summer school teaching English to Jesuit priests and was extremely happy - I laughed lots, met wonderful people and was really healed - but it was so horrible and I have never forgotten it. If you are in such a situation get out. Listen to those who know and love you and see yourself reflected in their eyes. If this is you, Pen, lots and lots of blessings on you. Lots of blessings on you anyway!Anne Boothhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17160915179685300264noreply@blogger.com