Clothing

 What determines your choice of clothing?

Tell me about it; I'm interested.

I think it's different for different people.

For me there are five determinants.

Firstly, my body is hypermobile, so I always wear soft, stretchy clothes. If I wear tailored woven garments, they are stronger than my body is. If I wear heavy clothes — like thick jumpers in cotton or wool — they are too heavy. If I wear shoes in thick leather, they hurt my ankles and give me blisters. So everything has to be soft and elastic, because that's what my body is — my skin, joints, blood vessels, muscles. I'm quite strong but very floppy; I look for the same in clothes. The fabrics have to be soft to the touch, not at all scratchy or rough. I mostly have polyester sweaters/hoodies, either knitted or fleece, and cotton t-shirts (or polo shirts) underneath.

For the same reason I always wear Birkenstock shoes, because my feet and ankles are soft and collapse-y. I buy them secondhand because Birkenstock shoes changed. They became heavier and very unyielding. My feet don't wear shoes in, it's more the other way round. So I look for the old sort on eBay. I have a small collection (three pairs) that I hope will live longer than I do.

Secondly, I like clothes that are modest, that enclose my body and make a kind of shelter to live in, and keep myself private and peaceful living inside the clothes. In consequence I tend to buy tops about 2 sizes larger than what measurements would suggest. I am not ashamed of my body but I don't want people to look at it. I don't want it to catch anyone's attention. I prefer to be a kind of ambulant mind. I always wear long sleeves and high necks, and either long trousers or long skirts.

Thirdly, there are some colours I'm always drawn to. For tops I best like mid-deep blue, or warm orangey/brick reds. I have a couple of beige or grey or black tops, but I don't like them so much. I buy my clothes second-hand on eBay, so I have to choose from what there is available once the essential criteria (soft, stretchy, modest) are satisfied, and that means sometimes having a colour I like less. Bright colours make me feel very tired; I think they must have some kind of vibration or resonance — I'm better with soft/deep colours. The photo below is one of the sorts of red I can wear, almost orange, but I prefer a brownish brick red really. It just depends what there is on eBay.

I like this colour better, but it's thick jacket not a top.

Fourthly, I don't usually wear patterned clothes: solid colours or checks. I do have one floral skirt that I made, and one floral dress. 

Fifthly, I have to consider shoes in buying the bottom half of my clothing. In the winter I wear warm socks and Birkenstock lace-up shoes, and I have massive feet —UK11, EU45 for shoes, UK10, EU44 for sandals. That limits the types of clothes I can wear, unless I want to look unbelievably weird; and I don't like drawing attention to myself.  

I like skirts, but they look dreadful with my shoes and socks, okay with sandals and bare feet in the summer. So through the winter I mostly wear the kind of trousers that are jogging bottoms or sweatpants or whatever you know them as — soft, warm, thick, stretchy, and a relaxed shape. I have several pairs of trousers. One is straight-legged, Lands End in their Serious Sweats range that I got on eBay. Really comfy. Dark blue and very faded, which I like. My other pairs of trousers are from Sainsburys (their Tu clothing), in a barrel leg style. Two black pairs I got from eBay (both being sold together), and a green pair also from eBay. But I have three pairs (one grey, two black) that I bought new because Tu clothes are almost as cheap as eBay prices. That's a lot of trousers. Three of them (black, Tu) are shorter than the others, as is often the case with barrel leg style, but I don't like them as much. I don't like having loads of clothes, so I'll probably send them to the charity shop at some point.

So, in the winter I have Birkis and warm socks, baggy sweatpants, and a long-sleeved cotton t-shirt or polo shirt (all my tops have long sleeves), then with a roll-neck sweater or hoodie on top, then a fleece gilet over that, or a fleece jacket if it's very cold. I don't have any full-length coats except a voluminous packable rain mac, which I almost never wear even if it's raining because the swishy sound gets in my ears and I hate it.

In the summer I mostly wear skirts (I make my skirts, shop ones are always too skimpy) with a polo shirt and sandals.

Standard undies are useless for me, too tight-fitting and uncomfy. Under trousers I wear Patra silk short johns (fab, I love them) and under skirts I wear cropped PJ jersey bottoms. I can't stand proper bras so I wear what are accurately described as comfort bras — stretchy pull-on things that are for modesty, not to create a body shape. I have three vests (underwear) that I occasionally wear when it's really cold, but mostly I add extra outer layers rather than extra under layers.

I wear fingerless gloves in cold weather. I have a couple of knitted hats and quite a lot of kantha cotton ones I made myself (see here and here). I like wearing hats; they kind of enclose my mind and keep it peaceful.

And yes, if you were wondering by now, I am what is known as neurodivergent (not keen on the term). My whole family is.

I always wear earrings, but rarely any other jewellery, not even a wedding ring. My hands change size from moment to moment (because of the hypermobility) so I've had rings fall off when I've been buying frozen peas — there's no point.

How about you? What are your criteria?