Friday, 16 March 2012

Stylle

Any day the Badger doesn’t have to zoom away and involve himself in Busy Work, we have our evening in the morning and chat in bed for a long time before we get up.

Today our conversation ranged over many matters.  While he was making a cup of tea downstairs I crawled into the attic space through the hatch in the eaves to survey the muddle that needs sorting out there, and dragged the various stored items into our bedroom for perusal and to give me access to face the Cleaning That Must Be Done.

Then, back in bed with a cup of tea we talked about our spice shelves delivered yesterday by a man who helpfully makes sets of shelves of any dimensions required.  The Badger said he is interested in making things so always feels curious about the mode of manufacture involved in such artefacts.  And I asked him in what language the word “make” originates, because the word “manufacture” has obviously a Latin root and it intrigued me finding “make” and “manufacture” side by side in the same sentence.  The Badger said he thought it probably came from the German “machen”.    Then we considered the other meanings of make – for example in the medieval song I syng of a mayde þat is makeles, in which makeles (makeless) means “matchless” in the sense of “peerless”.

And when the Badger later got up and oozed off into the world, I carried on thinking about that song and its beautiful second verse:
He came also stylle þer his moder was as dew in aprylle, þat fallyt on þe gras.
(He came all so still, there where his mother was, as dew in April that falleth on the grass)

It’s about Jesus’s coming into the world, uniting the being of the cosmic and heavenly Christ, the identity of the Godhead, with the human flesh of Mary.

And I stopped on the word “stylle,” which intrigued me because it’s a big word, having no adequate parallel in modern English.

It’s with us yet in German – Stille nacht, heilige nacht, that we translate as Silent night, holy night; and in the description of the Amish as Die Stille im Lande (the quiet folk of the earth).

“Silent” is only part of what is meant by the Middle English stylle and the German stille.  Full of peaceful, quiet, calm, restful – stylle means all of that.  And a person who is stylle will correlatingly be mindful – noticing, hearing, really present to any encounter.  The nearest we have lingering in modern English to summon the sense of stylle, is the adage “Still waters run deep.”

He cam also stylle . . .  There’s an old Spiritual, Steal away to Jesus.  “Steal” in that sense has some relation to this word stylle

He cam also stylle . . . It is saying, He stole into this world . . . as simply and unobtrusively as the dew that you cannot see falling, cannot see it at all until its presence accumulates on the grass.  Though you can feel the dew of the morning in the air all around.

It’s there again in Elijah’s experience of the Spirit as a still, small voice – elsewhere translated as a silent, thin sound.  Interesting.  In Middle English (that’s medieval English) there’s also a word smal, meaning slender or narrow – Chaucer describes the arm of a young girl as “smal” (heheh – my spellcheck hates these words and keeps rendering stylle as “style” and smal as “small”).  Slender.  Delicate.  The Spirit breathes into us as a stylle, smal voice.  Quiet, restful, calm, full of peace, unobtrusive, hard to pin down or define, slender, delicate, fine.

Sometimes people leaving reviews for my Hawk & the Dove novels criticise them for incorporating into the monks’ speech phraseology that seems modern.  They think I’ve got it wrong.  What they mean is that I should use eighteenth century idiom (if I went any further back they just wouldn’t be able to understand it).  But I didn’t get it wrong, I thought about every sentence, every phrase, every word – that’s how I write.  In my novels set in the medieval monastery, I have tried to capture the quality of earthiness and immediacy of medieval speech, and the down-to-earth, cheerful, almost casual conversational speech of monastics.  Sometimes that means using phraseology that seems anachronistic because it creates the right feel for both the time and the context.  But I love language – love Middle English, and exploring the landscape of language, tracing my finger along the roots of words to where they disappear into the earth where they grew.

In the book my publishers are currently considering for publication (that would be Book 7 of the Hawk & Dove series), the word bradawl occurs.  I spent a long time – maybe an hour or so – finding out about how and when and from where “awl” and “bradawl” had come into our language before I let it loose in my book.

But stylle is a beautiful word.  That will stay with me all day.

--------------------------------------------------- 

365 366 Day 76 - Friday March 16th   



 Assorted buttons, as you can see.  Put together with other things to make up a craft kit and Freecycled.

Friday, 9 March 2012

Expotition!

Ooh, this is exciting!

We are off on an expotition.  Well not all of us, just Hebe, the Badger and me.  We’re going to Yorkshire, taking my Mama along and dropping her off to play in her old stamping grounds en route.

First we’re going to Stanbrook Abbey’s new eco-convent at Wass (watch the fab video of them embedded in that article, and see their re-location described by the BBC as "Eco-nuns on the run" here!) staying a couple of nights in one of their pine lodges at Crief Farm.  I’ll be able to meet in person their abbess, Sister Andrea Savage – we’ve exchanged letters but never seen each other.  I hope while we’re there we might be able to go and see Ampleforth Abbey which lies a few miles away and is the general location of my St Alcuins Abbey in the Hawk and Dove series.  Father Cuthbert Madden is their abbot, and he and I have also exchanged letters and he says he uses passages from my books in his monastic conferences (I’m not sure what that is – I think it might be like Chapter homilies or something), but he seems to be very busy so I didn’t suggest I come and interrupt the impossible schedule he already has to juggle.

Then we retrace our footsteps down to York where, by dint of persevering for TWO HOURS one morning is the shove and thrust of other people online trying to do the same thing, I managed to get us 2 nights at the Micklegate Travelodge just by the Ouse Bridge in the £19 per night sale (woohoo!).

So we will be able to go to Evensong at the Minster (where I will be specially praying for you and Michael and all the family, Julie F), and have lunch at Betty’s café (the little one in Stonegate) and supper at Galtres Lodge in Low Petergate.

While we are in York we’ll pop down to Thorganby to see the Carmelite sisters at Thicket Priory and check out the new convent they built in the veggie garden (see the video about it here).  Again, I have exchanged letters with their Sister Anne, but it will be a real treat to meet her in person.

Then back down to Hastings on Wednesday, collecting Mama from Saffron Walden (where she lived before she moved down here to Battle) on the way.

So, I’m off on my travels like Snufkin and will see you next week, with some pics if I get myself and the Badger organised to take his camera – which, unlike mine, actually has a memory card!

Meanwhile, all those links should keep you happily employed while I'm away! xxx

--------------------------------------------------- 

365 366 Day 69 – 75
Friday March 9th  - Thursday March 15th   
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here) 



Well, this is a Composite Thing, and I’m posting it today to cover several days, because it had about 22 music CDs in it.  I gave it to a lady who came for one of many other Freecycled things.   She took it to look through, select out any she wanted to keep, and Freecycle the rest on. 

I LOVE Freecycle!

A happy day

Such a happy day.

 The Jesus Army is a Christian movement with a focus on community.  They have centres in Coventry, London and Northampton, and publish a regular magazine called Jesus LifeThere was an excellent interview with Shane Claiborne in the current issue. If you click the link, you can see James with Shane, both of them wearing the bright red crosses of the Jesus Army. Yesterday Paul from the Northampton Jesus Centre and Julie and James from the Coventry Centre came to spend a few hours in our home to interview me about the books I write and the life of our household, for their magazine.

It turns out that the people of the Jesus Army really like my Hawk and Dove series of novels, because they are about relationships in community – not idealised relationships or perfect human beings, but life with rough edges living through the experience of being transformed by the grace of God, which is what being part of the Jesus Army is all about too.

The interview felt like a right thing to do, but I hadn’t expected to have such a nice time.  I’d met Paul before, because a few years back when I lived in Aylesbury he appeared from somewhere out of the Mists of Life into my computer and made friends with me.  Recently he called by to see me because he has family in Hastings and comes down here sometimes, and we have become friends because Paul's heart is drawn to simplicity. But Julie and James I had never met before.  And they are all three such lovely people – open and kind and full of faith.


--------------------------------------------------- 

365 366 Day 68 Thursday March 8th  
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here) 

   

This was a good thing, that’s why I bought it.  An insulated tiffin box, so you can keep your rice and dahl hot to eat later.  Problem: none of us ever used it.  Donated.

Wednesday, 7 March 2012

Thoughts on a rainy day

 A day of storm, wind blustering wild around this old house, and rain spattering on the windows, clouds and fitful gleams of sudden light.

It recalled to my mind this song that I loved so much as a teenager – one of those I listened to over and over and over again, until it fused with the substance of my soul.

The sentiments it expresses are fundamentally at variance with my own these days, but it still tugs at my heartstrings, and I still find it beautiful.  Paul Simon is a superlative musician.

I don't miss my youth.  So much depression, so much sorrow, so many difficulties.  Impossible world.  In middle age, I have found peace, though about old age I feel apprehension.  But listening to this connects me up again to my 14-year-old self as if the years between had melted away.  "Like the rain" indeed.  

Busy day tomorrow.  Someone is coming to interview me.  I have no idea what they might ask.  I'll tell you tomorrow.

--------------------------------------------------- 


365 366 Day 67 Wednesday March 7th     
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here) 




The second of the two cat toilets.  Freecycle flourishes in our town, and is much appreciated because many people live in significant poverty here.  I love giving things away.  It has the same joy as when I was a small child, sitting on the sandy beach at Scarborough, taking handfuls of the sand and enjoying the feel of it trickling away, watching its falling grains, their stream arcing with the wind current.

Famous books that could have been written by minimalists:
Goodbye To All That
Bleak House (a tale of Bitter Experience from those who overdid it)
And Then There Were None
To Have And Have Not
All Quiet On The Western Front
Grime and Punishment
Gone With The Wind
The Way We Live Now
Scoop
Things Fall Apart
An Artist Of The Floating World




    

Tuesday, 6 March 2012

We have a kitchen

So, finally, our kitchen is finished!
It looks like this.



We got the adequate space we wanted for the washing machine in the end.



Our things fit right in and look pretty on the shelf.



We have a new cooker - a small, inexpensive sort that works properly.



There's somewhere to sit and eat lunch.


Perfect.


When we moved in, it looked like this:




 I feel very pleased that we don't need all that storage - though we do have a secret weapon.  Just through the doorway from our kitchen is the understairs cupboard, footprint about 3'x3', which we use as a pantry.  It looks like this:







My apologies if you feel five photographs of the inside of a pantry seems a little obsessive.  One of my keenest interests is in small space / simple living, and I feel carried away with joy when I behold the successfulness of my pantry, which has got everything in it BUT all visible and accessible and easy to clean.  I clasp my hands and gaze at it like a hamster.



----------------------------------------------------- 

365 366 Day 66 Tuesday March 6th     
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here)
Unsuccessful hat.   

Monday, 5 March 2012

Studio and sewing


A few days ago on Facebook, Anna asked to see some photos of the new sewing corner Alice and Hebe have included in the studio.



As you can see through the window, the woodstore has no more logs in view on that side - we've burned most of our winter stash now.



Hebe made that toasting fork hanging up.  It's really handy because it has those delicate tines.  



At the moment the sewing corner still looks very tidy! I wonder how long that will last?



In case you’re wondering what the things on the window sill are, one is a statue of St Francis that came to us when my Mama moved to an apartment with no garden.



The other is a small figure of Venus made by Alice as part of a series of figures inspired by netsuke.



The rest of the studio is not so tidy but very interesting.



This is Hebe’s banker for standing the stones on for letter-cutting.  The Badger made it for her.



This is a monstrance base she’s been making for a Catholic priest.



And her preliminary drawing.



I like the studio.  It’s full of interesting things Hebe and Alice have made.



There’s a fab new glass panel, but I must ask Alice’s permission to show you I think, as it’s a commission.



Oh - and the kitchen is coming on!





----------------------------------------------------- 


365 366 Day 65 Monday March 5th     
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here) 




The Wretched Wretch is growing up!  He drinks from a proper cup now, and has no truck with such as these!




    

Zzzzz . . .

Long day, so very tired - somewhere about two hours ago my battery just died and I rolled into bed and crashed out.  I think maybe I will spend a while watching some of Into Great Silence, which is the ultimate tranquillising shot of comfort.

Night night dears. 

I wrote this yesterday, but my internet connection was also tired and crashed, so it wouldn't let me post it.

----------------------------------------------------- 

365 366 Day 64 Sunday March 4th    
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here) 




Ah – I have this all wrapped up to give to my friend Rosie Humphrey when our paths cross at Spring Harvest Christian conference in April.   I really love this ceramic sculpture, and I haven’t had it very long.  There’s a new tiny shop opened in an out-of-the-way part of town where previous businesses had failed.  This one is called “A Flock of Crafty Birds” and is selling all kinds of artefacts made by local craftspeople as well as bright and cheery vintage pieces of furniture and other household items.  One time when I’d just been paid for some writing, I wanted to buy something from this shop to encourage other people engaged in freelance creative work, so I got a lovely colourful sweater for the Wretched Wretch, and this ceramic piece.  I think it’s so beautiful, but we have a number of other beautiful objects, and too many just begins to form into clutter.  So with regret I chose this one to pass on, especially since unlike some of our other things it has no history making it dear to its owner.




    

Saturday, 3 March 2012

Oh, please don't tell us your dream . . .

I am hoping Buzzfloyd will read this and send me the text of her poem (a villanelle, I think) Oh, please don’t tell us your dream, because it is very hilarious, I have lost it, and what I am about to tell you immediately brings it to mind (if she does, I'll add it on to the post).

All my life (since I attended school) I have had a recurring type of dream.

In the dream I have some kind of school obligation looming that I cannot fulfil.  Sometimes I arrive at a new college and have to attend a seminar (or, more usually, an exam), but I do not know the building and cannot find the way and get more are more miserable, panicky and despairing.

Sometimes the dream is that I have an exam coming up (usually that day, and I am going into college to sit the exam) for which I haven’t prepared whatsoever and simply don’t have the necessary knowledge to tackle it.

Sometimes I dream my coursework has to be handed in and I haven’t done it.

These dreams sufficiently resemble my actual experience of real school to be very compelling.  In them I am always wretched and terrified, feeling doomed and trapped and not knowing where to turn.

But the last two times I dreamt along these lines, a sea change has manifested.

The time before last, I dreamt I had to go into college for something completely beyond me, I can’t remember whether an exam or a tutorial or what, but it was too difficult and too much, completely beyond me and I had not the wherewithal to fulfil the requirements.  But this time, instead of panicking and feeling frightened and trapped, I just made a decision: “I think I’ll drop this course.”  And I did. 

Last night again I dreamed that I was at school; and began to feel uneasy that I had done no maths work at all that academic year – had no maths tuition or assignments.  I began to suspect that something was wrong or had been overlooked.  I felt concerned that when a maths lesson did come up I would be unprepared and out of my depth.  I began to wonder if “They” had elected to group all the sciences together so this term would be all arts and next term would be the sciences, more difficult for me and too much to manage.  The usual anxieties began, but this time I made a decision: “I think I’ll drop maths”.  A counter-argument began, that They wouldn’t let me, that without maths I’d be sunk, that maths was essential.  “Yes,” I thought: “but I think I’ll drop it anyway.”  And after that I felt fine.

It seems I finally feel free to decide for myself.

One day, maybe I’ll dream I’ve graduated; but by then I’ll be very old perhaps.


OK, here we go, this is Buzzfloyd's poem - she reminds me that it is in fact a rondeau redoublé, which poetic form you can read about here.



Rondeau redoublé – An Anecdote Unwanted

Please don’t tell us your dream.
As you bend my poor ear,
I’m trying not to scream.
Nobody wants to hear!

I wonder why I’m here,
Watching you fondly beam.
We could be stuck here all year –
Please don’t tell us your dream.

As you warm to your theme,
You then shift down a gear,
Detailing every scheme
As you bend my poor ear.

Please let the end be near!
I see how your eyes gleam
While mine threaten a tear;
I’m trying not to scream.

Did this, at some point, seem
Relevant – the point clear?
This is a mutant meme
Nobody wants to hear.
Please don’t tell.

----------------------------------------------------- 

365 366 Day 63 March 3rd    
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here) 




 Oh, these are good!  Two work boxes.  Why did I have two?  Well, I ordered one at a very good price in a sale, and the firm who sells them sent it off to me to my previous address way up country miles away in Aylesbury (they had the new address and it appeared on the invoice, but Bill hadn’t spoken to Charlie or something and the despatch guys got it wrong).  They said they’d send me a replacement, which they did.  Meanwhile my champion friend Rosanna who lives in Aylesbury said she’d go and enquire at my old address if perchance they had the parcel and had not yet returned it: which turned out to be the case. Not sure what to do as I had two now (though it would be honest to say I had both, it does not always help large organisations if you mess up their systems with unhelpful honesty), I opened the Aylesbury parcel when it came, only to discover that the workbox had been shoddily put together and was not fit for sale anyway.  If I sent it back I’d have to pay postage and point out that it was in effect broken and they’d have to bin it (and probably get confused and send me another).  So since it was their error in the first place, I just kept it and the Badger took it to bits and fixed it.

These workboxes went to a friend who teaches Godly Play and is also a Colour Consultant – both occupations generating a lot of bits and pieces urgently needing storage!



    

Friday, 2 March 2012

Dogs books and people

Yesterday for half an hour I was a Writer, talking about my books and what’s in them, answering questions about being a writer and being treated as if I were important.

The people in the group were elderly but reasonably well off, and I did a good discount on the copies I’d taken along, so lots of them bought books. 

Partly they were encouraged to read them because my friend Pearl had come along, and at the end of the question time she surprised me by launching into an impassioned recommendation of my books – telling the people to read the pages of endorsements at the beginning to see how wonderful they are!  That was nice (and it seemed to work)!

Anyway, I’m glad I had the money from selling books because on Facebook I saw a photo of this little dog waiting in a cage. 






 He had been taken from the streets by the authorities in whatever US city he lived in, and was being kept for a week or so in a cage.  Unless they raised $250 dollars to take him to a rescue place, he’d just be killed.  There were lots of other dogs too, but this one looked so patient and so sad.  Not a young dog.  I get so fed up with the human race sometimes.  But Pearl saying how wonderful she thinks my books are meant those people snapped up discounted copies meant I had something in the bank to send this little dog in America meant he didn’t have to die after all.

Then today I was not an important person any more but back to life as normal, using crumpled kitchen foil and left-over carpet cleaner to try to restore our grill pan to the condition I think of as “clean enough”.


----------------------------------------------------- 


365 366 Day 62 March 2nd   
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here) 




Sometimes I do question my sanity.  I got this fake ivy at Christmas, thinking it was just the thing for parts of the house where insufficient light makes it impractical to ask plants to grow.  Why?  Why did I ever think I wanted artificial ivy? For heaven’s sake!!



    

Thursday, 1 March 2012

Permaculture inspiration!




So impressed by this! I would love to have the initiative and confidence to launch on out and do this kind of thing. That is so cool!

And what about this, hey?!?

Well, today (March 1st but much later, it's only a quarter to two in the morning right now - must go to bed!) I am the speaker for a group of ladies.  I can speak about anything I like.  Though I can prattle on happily to the Badger for hours and have plenty to say to my family and a bad habit of interrupting at meetings, I confess I have No Idea what to say to these ladies.  I mean, who are they?  What do they want to know?   Strange thing, being A Speaker.  Still, it doesn't happen to me very often these days.  "Come and speak," they said, "we need a Speaker."  
"About what?" I asked.
"Anything you like," they said.


Update.  Now, at breakfast time, having woke up with the sun and pottered about on Facebook for a while checking out Innermost House and various friends, I have discovered that this very day is World Book Day.  Relevant, right?  I'll let that be a starting point.


---------------------------------------------------------------

365 366 Day 60 Thursday March 1st  
(if you don’t know what I’m talking about, see here)








Well, I have a funky little needle-book (A what? This kinda thing) that I got from Made In Hastings where I store all my needles and pins, so I no longer really have a need for a pincushion.  Every now and then this would’ve come in handy, but I’d rather have the space.