Monday, 7 September 2015

Words failing me

Today on Facebook a friend posted this beautiful quotation:

"Flee for a while from your tasks, hide yourself for a little space from the turmoil of your thoughts. Come, cast aside your burdensome cares, and put aside your laborious pursuits. For a little while give your time to God, and rest in him for a little while. Enter into the inner chamber of your mind, shut out all things save God and whatever may aid you in seeking God; and having barred the door of your chamber, seek him."
                                 ~ Anselm of Canterbury

Monks (and, perhaps to a lesser extent, nuns) often write thus about silence and seclusion, encouraging people to, as William Penn put it, ‘live retiredly’. More and more it speaks to me.

It’s not meant to be a way of leisure and idleness, of course. For one thing there are many chores to be done – washing, sweeping, cooking, gardening; generally setting the house in order. And there is the community to attend to, whatever that may mean in any one individual’s circumstances. Being present when people are gathered. Being free and willing to help with whatever supports and encourages them. In the case of our household, that can mean taking time around a meal table to talk through issues that interest, perplex or challenge one or some of us. Or bringing someone else’s laundry in if it comes on to rain, or volunteering to cook the supper or wash the dishes, or be part of the expedition to the store to get the Friday groceries. Or clean the bathroom. Taking care of the fabric of life in such ways is also how we care for each other. 

And beyond the household, the wider family, then whatever responsibilities sit right with my own gifts/graces/obligations to the household of God in the church, and to the community. This week, for me, that means Sunday worship, preparing a seminar talk and a Quiet Day, attending the Local Preachers’ meeting; also selecting things I think I could easily do without to give away on Freegle, or donate to the hospice charity shop.

And then there is the tending to the wellbeing of creation, in my case no more than sending permaculture messages along the jungle drums, being part of maintaining the wildlife garden we have made here, feeding the foxes, the badgers and the crows, and living in ways of simplicity that tread a fraction more lightly on the Earth.

But in all this, which is the outworking of my faith, I am conscious that words come into it relatively little. I get the impression that most writers thrive on books and reading, but not me. I do read, and I research, but it is increasingly the case that words don’t really do it for me. I prefer silence, and thinking. I know I am in the presence of God, but it becomes artificial when I import words out of a sense of duty.

Thinking about it today, I realized how weighty is the portion given to words in the common practice of the Christian faith. So much emphasis is placed on sermons, prayers, Bible reading, meetings held together by a tissue of liturgy, creeds, doctrinal formulae … Beyond that – chatting, phone calls, social calls …

As though the substance of faith were the application of an unremitting diligence of words.

For me, this has become dry and weary. My life feels the lifeblood of God pulsing along its veins – but in firelight, in early dew, in bird flight, in cloud banks, in the eyes of a child. Not in words.

I didn’t expect it would become so. My faith lives and thrives, but would prefer to be expressed in silence.



Friday, 4 September 2015

Quietness



 Hello m’dears.

Two things ~

Firstly, my publisher has accepted A Day and a Life, which will be the last book in The Hawk and the Dove series. It’s scheduled to be out next summer – July, I think. So that’s good news.

Then secondly, if anyone is close by and interested, on Wednesday September 23rd I am offering a Quiet Day at Penhurst. Its title (taken from Desiderata) is Aridity and Disenchantment. All of us go through times when we are disappointed, weary and disillusioned, when prayer feels too difficult to persevere, and life seems pointless. How can we remain faithful and grow in our discipleship when such times come, especially if the aridity persists over months and years? This is what we shall be exploring in the beautiful setting of Penhurst Place, an ancient tiny manor house deep in the Sussex countryside. Details here.

I loved these photos we managed to capture of our cat Ted, above sitting quietly alongside the bodhisattva in the passageway (no mouse – he was just praying), and below luxuriating in a fluffy throw on the beanbag chair in Hebe’s peaceful room.


Peace to you. xx



Tuesday, 1 September 2015

Just bits and pieces

CROWS ~

Our crow family visits faithfully, the parents now sometimes watching from a distance to give the children a chance to do things by themselves.  

Some of the young ones are bolder than others. A few days ago, the father crow brought one of his children to get some breakfast. Perhaps because I was nearby, the child was too scared to relax and eat. S/he stood on the wall, the other side of the dish from her/his father, while he ate. His idea was that he should eat, then fly away leaving her to eat. Each time he flew away, so did the child. On the few occasions the child stayed on the wall, s/he just stood stock still (Er… can I … should I…) It’s not that s/he wasn’t hungry. There were dried meal worms, suet with bugs in it, old scraps of cat food – in fact a delicious breakfast, almost as good as an eyeball. S/he just stood there, dribbling, wanting to eat but not quite sure … So I took pity on them and went in.

Each crow has his/her own distinct call, quite different from the others. The boldest of the young ones, very interested in us, has an erratic gargling voice – I love it.

Yesterday when I took out their supper, I couldn’t see them around so I took the crow call with me to let them know the food was ready. Then I saw one sentinel crow waiting patiently in the tree; but I blew the call anyway. He was dozing, and it woke him up - made him jump, poor thing.


WATER ~

We had a day without water last weekend – a burst pipe just north of the area where we live left our neighbourhood with no mains water, without warning. 

Happily, because it has rained a lot recently and our water butts are all full, and because of our various eco-practices, it made barely any difference to us. We just had to tie the taps in cloths to break the habit of going to turn them on. 

We did get some extra spring water (bottled), because I haven’t yet sorted out a system for filtering the roof water to make it potable – I could put it through the distiller, I suppose; the only problem with that is it loses its goodness then as well as its badness.


SUN ~

This is the day to send in our solar panels meter reading for the tariff the government pays us for the electricity we send in to the National Grid. 

Blessedly, my father died just before these tariffs began, under Gordon Brown’s under-appreciated and imaginative government. My father left me some money, enough to pay off our mortgage and put solar panels on the roof. The timing meant that because we were in at the beginning of the government solar scheme, we got the top rate (the amount offered went down year by year). We depend on it now. 

There’s something so pleasing about living in a house that pays its own bills – I mean, how sweet is that? The house contributes to the housekeeping! 

We are paid according to the quarter's meter reading , and part of last quarter’s payment went to buying a big stash of upcycled sawdust wood briquettes. They’re fantastic – they burn as hot as coal, kindle with immense ease, and though they are made of wood, it’s the sweepings, waste from the timber industry, so no cutting down extra trees just to burn. And there are no noxious fumes, they are made only through pressure, no glue involved. This quarter’s payment will buy the rest of our fuel for the winter.


FIBROMYALGIA ~

I have been a bad girl and eaten what I should not, and given myself the most awful fibromyalgia flare-up. 

Sigh. 

Tired unto death, and full of moving pains and stiffened joints. 

So I’ve gone back to eating Only What I Should, and it’s gradually easing. Emphasis on ‘gradually’! 

I am grateful for it really – it’s good to have a system sensitive enough to keep me on the strait and narrow; either I see to it that I stay extremely healthy or I’m prostrated in short order! 

What was it Thomas Cranmer said in the Book of Common Prayer (the General Confession)? “We have left undone those things which we ought to have done, And we have done those things which we ought not to have done, And there is no health in us”. 

Yep. That’s me at the moment. Still, onward and upward. 

The future (“But thou, O Lord, have mercy upon us miserable offenders”) is in kale and organic free-range eggs.

*        *        *


Well, I think that’s it, really. I am reading Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search For Meaning; today I will visit our beloved Granddad in the hospice, nearing the end of his life, and my beautiful Mama in her apartment that looks out over the hills and fields. And now I  must get up and feed the crows.

Wednesday, 26 August 2015

Book covers

Today I had the covers through for the next two books out in The Hawk and the Dove series new edition.



 The Breath of Peace has been previously self-published, so you might have read it, but The Beautiful Thread is completely new.



They will both be out in February 2016. After that there will be one more, A Day and a Life, completing the series.

A Day and a Life is still going through the publishing meetings to ascertain if it will be accepted for publication, but the signs are good so far. If all goes well it will be out in the summer of 2016.


Meanwhile this book, 52 Original Wisdom Stories, is available in the US too, now (here). I’m pleased with it – I think you would enjoy it. It has life, the universe and everything in it, and explores the cosmic round of things; is full of wondering.


Tuesday, 25 August 2015

Creating, redeeming, sustaining; God and permaculture.

I’ve been watching a YouTube video about the effectiveness of permacultural techniques for greening the desert. Excellent. Inspiring. Hope, in a situation of increasing aridity and despair.

I felt intrigued by the resistance to the approach. Towards the end of the film, they mentioned that in a year of drought (2008? 2009?) in that region, all the olives – all the olives – in the area failed entirely, except those in the permaculture village. So, not only is their planting healthy and productive, it is thriving in the context of a small farm (I think they said ten acres) plonked right in the middle of a dustbowl where nothing else is working. So – why isn’t the idea spreading like wildfire? Why isn’t the whole of humanity adopting permaculture practices? It’s easy, practical, inexpensive.

It’s as though we are blinded even to common sense by ideas and traditions we’ve been sold or handed down, such that even when the evidence is right under our noses, we plod doggedly on making destructive and unsustainable choices.

And we thought, Hebe and me when we were talking about this a few days ago and again today, maybe this is part of what the Bible means when it says, ‘Be ye not conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.’ In church that’s always expounded in strictly religious terms; but what if it’s not about religion – what if it’s about life? What if the revolution of the Holy Spirit is for the practical, ordinary, business and domestic choices we make in the everyday? What if the outworking of the Spirit in our lives is less about robes and altars or rites and ceremonies or hierarchies and dogma, or what books children are allowed to read on Sunday – more about greening the desert and understanding how to keep ourselves and the planet healthy?


So that opening to the shalom of God occurs everywhere we allow insight and understanding to flood into our lives like light, changing our perspective and practice to something that creates, redeems and sustains life.

Not, I mean, that we abandon the sacred for the secular; but that our faith becomes practical and the ordinary business of our lives becomes holy.