Sunday 6 February 2011

Vulnerability

The YouTube video I embedded on this blog yesterday was found and sent on to me by my daughter Fi, who is part of the household where I live.  She is becoming my in-house researcher.  This morning when I woke up - having held hands with my sweetie and chatted and prayed together and had our morning kiss, he went off to work out on the Wii Fit and take a shower, and I groped for my laptop to check out correspondence.
And there was this email from Fi (she has the room underneath ours but, hey, sometimes email is good...).  The subject line of her email was 'something to ponder', and she sent me this link, adding 'see what you think of this lady'.

It was the same yesterday when she sent me the Song Around the World video, saying she thought I might like it.  Like it?  Like it?  It blew my mind!  I watched it four times straight through, posted it everywhere and it totally transformed my day!

Same with this thing that she sent me today.  It's a 20 minute talk.  There is more wisdom in that 20 minutes than most of us could reach in 20 years.  I will download this.  I will watch it again.  I will remember it.  I will store it in my heart.

Basically, this video tells me what I need to know.  It is a gift of God to me, and an answer to prayer.  So I thought you might like to have the chance to share it too.

Here's the link:

Brene Brown: The power of vulnerability | Video on TED.com

24 comments:

Ganeida said...

Great speaker! That was really good.

Buzzfloyd said...

Yes!

These are not new ideas to me, but they are voiced perfectly and directly. What she is saying ties in exactly with the things I am learning about raising children - not just on a wishy-washy level, but in terms of neurobiology, nutrition and growth.

It also ties in with what I know perfectly well because it is part of who I am, owing to having been raised with that sense of worth and self-belief.

Ember, remind me to tell you about my memory of breastfeeding.

E. said...

Thank you for sharing it! What a powerful talk and important message to all.
It made me laugh and cry and smile and I've shared it too on both facebook and my blog.
Give Fi my thanks too!

http://mysoulgavemegoodcounsel.blogspot.com/

Pen Wilcock said...

:0) Hi ladies!
Hope things are settling down in Queensland, Ganeida x

Looking forward to hearing about that memory, Buzz.

E, I love your profile pic - that's new isn't it? Really beautiful.

Tony Collins said...

Hi darling

This talk really made good sense. I wanted her to go further, to explore routes to vulnerability, because for me much of the appeal of the Christian faith is that it allows you to peep out from behind the hedge and to acknowledge that you are worth it. For further discussion ...

Badger xxx

Linda said...

I find it hard to relate to the people who do the things mentioned at the end. My government particularly State and the people who live mostly in Melbourne have become this way so very recently. I remember when things were different. I think the floods and fires have helped the more oldfashioned people in our country to have a say and help water things down. I have found that people I know on facebook, normal everyday people that I knew from public school years ago, make things like the weather into an identity that they can then blame. Have heard all sorts. I think they really believe it. I try very hard not to take pills or to drink, I don't. Sometimes when you meet so many others you think why struggle with it. I can see it is worth it.

Pen Wilcock said...

:0)

SilverLeaf said...

Hi Ember. You and I have a mutual friend - Julie B - who posted a link to your blog. I've enjoyed your recent entries and have read some of your books (also recommended by Julie) which I have LOVED and recommended to others!

I came by today and watched the video featuring Brene Brown. Wow! It was another beacon of Light and wisdom exposing my darkness of soul. Same message...different mode of delivery. Ann Voskamp's new book - One Thousand Gifts - shares a similar message of "daring to live fully right where you are" by practicing eucharisteo (giving thanks).

I left the church seven years ago and the "walls" I erected to protect myself from being hurt, are the same walls that have robbed me of joy and gratitude and happiness. Little did I know that by numbing vulnerability, I numbed every other emotion as well.

I've been asking the Lord to show me how to live again and believe that learning to be vulnerable may be the key. Also, I'm learning to practice gratitude and honor the ordinary things in my life.

This video was a gift to me also. Amazing what God can use to tear down our walls of self-protection! So glad you shared the video with the rest of us.

Blessings...

Pen Wilcock said...

:o)

Hi SilverLeaf - I am so very glad to have met you. Blessings on your journey, wherever the path may lead. xx

Linda said...

The trouble is with being vulnerable in order not to get sick you may have to say no to people. By that I mean we can't put up with absolutely everything until we are strong enough to do so. No to other things as well like taking things a bit easier sometimes.

Pen Wilcock said...

Good point, Linda; to be well and happy we have to create and maintain appropriate boundaries and respect those of others. I haven't understood vulnerability as being without boundaries, though, more about being honest and authentic in our dealings with others, and not afraid to admit our weaknesses. I conceive of vulnerability as being something to do with trusting people, but that wouldn't be the same as allowing others to drain us or habitually take advantage of us.
If saying 'no' to people has been a struggle to thee, then certainly it will be important to protect thy times of solitude - the 'green pastures and still waters' times of Psalm 23 :0)

Linda said...

If we are going to feel everything, then we have to deal with some things I guess. I know some people may have help to deal with things which in effect means you don't have to say no, does that make sense.

Linda said...

No I have never numbed up, maybe overeaten a little, and haven't gotten sick, and have had to say no.

Pen Wilcock said...

I guess if we have been helped to sort out the tangles in our own heads, then we become spacious enough not to be forever fending off other people or feeling threatened by them. But each of us still will (according to temperament) have a responsibility to set and maintain appropriate boundaries for our own sake and the sake of others. x

Linda said...

True, eventually you grow or become such a person that people leave alone.

Linda said...

Unfortunately though the vulnerable ones in these two halves of people can sometimes be a bit of sport to the ones on the other side.

Linda said...

Is this where courage comes in? I forget.

Buzzfloyd said...

I think that issue is addressed by Brenee Brown in the video, isn't it? Vulnerability is to do with the quality of self we bring to our interactions with others, not to do with the quantity of those interactions or which ones we choose.

Linda said...

If you are feeling everything you have to be able to cope that is all. It is related to the eating, medicating and drinking.

Anna said...

This video was also a gift of God to me! The last 5 minutes especially, when she speaks of children. "You are born imperfect and wired for struggle, but you are worthy of Love and Belonging." Like it was said straight from heaven to me. Thank you!

Pen Wilcock said...

:0)

Pen Wilcock said...

Paula Deming wanted to comment here, but had technical difficulty leaving a comment. So she sent this via my page on Quaker Quaker:

"Dear Pen,
Thank you for sharing the video on vulnerability on your blog. It is wonderful.
I tried to comment on your blog, but I guess I don't have that kind of capability. I wanted to say a couple of things about vulnerability, since I have often been told I'm vulnerable. It is indeed about being open-hearted, and not about being a pushover. I hope the person who considered it to mean being a pushover can learn the difference.
Perhaps you can share with her my story. This past summer, I took a workshop on discipleship at the Friends General Conference Gathering; at the end, one of the participants wrote me a note as follows:
'The vulnerability you have shown us reminds us to be our true selves in discipleship.'
Does this attribute get me into trouble? Sometimes. I give my heart freely, and people occasionally respond by saying I'm intense. But I'd rather be what God calls me to be--Love--than fail God's call because I need to protect myself.
The other thing I want to mention: I loved the speaker's definition of courage. It enlarged on my understanding of a little note I have pasted on my computer monitor, which is "Courage comes through suffering." Suffering opens my heart and makes me compassionate.
Thank you for your excellent blog, Pen. I check it frequently.
Yours in the Light, Paula"

Linda said...

I was just responding to silverleaf's comments, not trying to argue.

Buzzfloyd said...

Don't worry, Linda, I think people were trying to be helpful, not argumentative.